Sunday, June 19, 2016

People don't like each other.

First of all I have my doubts about these so called (Syeds and Shareefs) direct descendants of Prophet Muhammad's (Peace be upon him)  in this part of the world, south Asia. 


(Seriously...look at us, our condition, arrogance, and  jahalat.....Syed and Shareef  would be here?

 Anyway !

People here, especially Shias and Urdu speaking in Karachi who migrated from India still claim to be the one, when it is so obvious that it is all made up. They also have no such evidence to prove it.  people in south Asia are Hindi origin, even if Pakistan got separated in 1947.  However, I take it as they say. They are proud of it and prefer their own people when it comes for marrying off their children.

However, things are changing in Karachi and in other urban sector. 

You can't keep your children unmarried just for your own. That is why when the blog being a syed zaadi  was a curse came out, many Syed people said this doesn't happen any more. They are well educated, urban peeps, direct descendants of Prophet  Muhammad's (Peace be upon him), marrying non -Syed, or anyone who is suitable to them.

( Fyi, they are not marrying non Syeds because they want to. Actually, it is not possible for find one as all have married to each other. The are less in numbers now and these our own doesn't work out in urban culture).

Well, they are still proud of it. So are others in all over Pakistan.

People have strange kind of romance with their lands, provinces, tribes, villages, languages and last names as they are just for their identity.

Every other person with some fancy feudal, tribal and religious last name from some remote areas are still  proud of it, even  in 2016, when nobody gives two hoot about anyone. And should not give either.

They dub it ‪‎caste and at a same time call themselves Muslims ( how ironic !!).

I have heard people around me shamelessly and proudly saying that they don't marry outside their families, ethnic groups, and caste: be it Syed or Malick, Afridi or Choudhary. Same goes for Shia, Sunni, Ahmedi and Ismilies peeps.

They have imposed things on themselves which doesn't even exist in the real. Sad part is when they justify if.

That's the way it is.

So, it is not just this girl who is facing this issue. There are many, waiting for someone from their own people.

Instead of two adult people, here marriages are between families. People are family oriented. Everyone is in a very close a family setup. They know each other. And scared of outsiders and vice versa. 

 Having an outsider is risk for the family, "What if she takes away the son, which is her husband, asks for a separate home?"

"hamary ghar ko tor rahi hai."

 It is  mostly  females who has to go through this. When a guy bring an outsider, it is  somehow OK. That outsider gal has to adjust, and our obedient females do it anyhow. No one wants to break their families. Still people have fear of others. 

When once in a blue moon someone tries an outsider, they become proud of different kind and justify it in his own way "buhat achy log hein. Dosry punjabi/sindhi/pakhtuoon..etc, etc ki tarha nahi "". (They are very good people, unlike other  punjabi/sindhi/pakhtuoon..etc, etc)

And most of the time it is seen that outsider gal still belongs to same ethnic group. Otherwise her entry into her husband's family is a hard nut to crack because being an outsider it is difficult to adjust where everyone knows everyone. And fortunately or unfortunately if that couple has issues, or decides to break up, the whole family blame that religion and ethnic group, "Dekha, humna kehty thy...#%/=÷ to hoty he asy hein. See ! Didn't we say, ***** are like this. "

And it's a fact whether you like it or not. It is just a compulsion to meet "others" even in our  daily lives, otherwise people don't like each other at all. That is why, we have such dramabazi, when it comes to accepting another human being as a spouse.

This is why despite many unmatched marriages, people are still into it. This is called power of family pressure, culture and good brainwashing since childhood. And when things are exactly like that then there is no option left. 

Somehow it is safe and wise, you know, if the social and family system is that close. It is also good for the new bride. Within family she wouldn't have to try so hard to adjust like others have to do.

So when there is very less option to meet and mingle, and  marriage is all about going from one home to another, then it is wise  to go to known house.

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