Friday, January 31, 2014
Inter-ethnic marriage and Pak.
Pakistani society is an ethically heterogeneous society. Every province has its own culture, language, dresses, food etc, etc, but when it comes to getting married, we don't feel comfortable with other ethnicity, even if other Pakistani is Muslim, five time namzi.
It is also not like that we are forbidden to do so, we are allowed, but tell me how many of us do that voluntary, happily, without any fear of society, family and what will people say?
Tell me how many Sindhi men fall for Pakhtun girls? Or how many Punjabi and Urdu speaking families tell rista aunties they have no issue with having Bloch daughter/son-in-law, or even in Karachi where people from all around the Pakistan are residing prefer to find someone from out side their ethnicity?
Only 20%, and sometimes, I think those who had done inter ethnic marriage, is from Allah, otherwise as much as I have seen in my life till now, people don't want an outsider in their homes.
Because we don't marry like, "hey, I wanna get marry." We marry like, when everyone in our family agrees, "hey, you should get married now, " We don't marry a person, we marry a family.
Sheerif people don't talk about their own arraignment, shuuuu. Mama will find someone. Go and play.
It is just " timing is changing," " change is inevitable," and many of us can't do anything about it. It is from God, otherwise we are still same and don't like change. We still prefer apna zaban wali/wali, someone from our own ethnic group, if not first, second cousin, relative, over an outsider.
There are many reasons for it.
But, I wouldn't give you any reason here, because I haven't understood them by myself yet. I dunno why people are like that. I do ask them off and on, why they prefer their own ethnicity, no intelligent answer yet.
There is no such harm in it either. If they find it is good for their family, or people from their own ethnicity are better for their kids, no one can stop them. However, it has played an important role in shaping our society, or what we are, and what type of nation we have become.
If it was a normal and common thing, there wouldn't be tu punjabi, mein a balochi type of thing. It might has cooled us down. People were not sticking out like sore thumb......tu sindhi, mein pakhtun.
Inter-ethnic marriages help people to accept and tolerate each other. Societies become open, and there is less extremism. It demolishes misunderstandings, stereotypes and myths about other ethnicity, help to bring people closer, and makes any nation, one nation especially for countries like Pakistan.